2008

At a holiday party Saturday night I came down with some kind of horrible, crippling abdominal illness. E-coli? Food poisoning? A previously only vaguely suspected allergy? Couldn't tell you, all I know is I spent late Saturday night and all of Sunday fighting off migraine-like symptoms (minus the headache) and literally crippling nausea and cramps, and I'm still under the weather today. I say this by way of disclosure, not to ask for sympathy, because I want you to be able to decide for yourself whether or not that's skewing my judgment when I say the following:

It occurs to me that I am not going to kiss 2008 good bye at midnight on the 31st.

I am going to drive a stake through its heart, cut off its head, fill its mouth with garlic and sanctified wafers, sew the mouth shut, and bury the head and the body separately at a crossroads.